SNAKES & THE IRRATIONAL FEAR OF SPENDING
Now that I have settled into retirement, I am aware of an irrational fear that keeps popping up inside me. I've focused most of my life on becoming debt free and saving for retirement but now that I'm retired with plenty of savings to fund my lifestyle, I'm afraid to spend my money. Apparently, I'm not alone according to this article that I just read (see link below).
When I was working on my Masters in Education, my thesis was "Coping With Cold Blooded Fear." I had two pet boa constrictors that I kept in my classroom; my students loved them but many adults were very afraid of them. Boa constrictors are not poisonous and can't strangle an adult so I identified this fear as an irrational one. I started doing public talks with my snakes around my neck. Giving the talks helped me identify how to help people move beyond their fears. People asked, "are they slimy...will they bite...will they get tight around your neck...what sex are they...what do they eat...what does cold blooded mean...where do you keep them..?"
I observed that, if you create a safe place and encourage people to engage their curiosity and ask questions, they often get comfortable enough to confront their fear and touch the snake. What doesn't work is telling people their fear is wrong or stupid.
When my irrational fear about spending money surfaces, what helps me is to look at the facts (our financial plan) and ask my financial advisor questions: What happens if the stock market crashes? How much money can I afford to lose? What happens to my plan if I spend a lot of money vacationing? How long will my money last? No question is wrong or stupid. Re-visiting the questions more than once is frequently required. Repetition is the mother of learning.
The goal is to be able to identify the facts so I can let go of the irrational fears. My trusted advisor helps me understand the facts about my money (how it is invested, projected growth, impacts of spending, etc.). I can then get comfortable with a spending plan that doesn't make me fearful and avoid making spending mistakes (click link below for spending mistakes).
So for you, go ahead and touch the boa constrictor.
Retirement Spending Mental Mistakes
Now that I have settled into retirement, I am aware of an irrational fear that keeps popping up inside me. I've focused most of my life on becoming debt free and saving for retirement but now that I'm retired with plenty of savings to fund my lifestyle, I'm afraid to spend my money. Apparently, I'm not alone according to this article that I just read (see link below).
When I was working on my Masters in Education, my thesis was "Coping With Cold Blooded Fear." I had two pet boa constrictors that I kept in my classroom; my students loved them but many adults were very afraid of them. Boa constrictors are not poisonous and can't strangle an adult so I identified this fear as an irrational one. I started doing public talks with my snakes around my neck. Giving the talks helped me identify how to help people move beyond their fears. People asked, "are they slimy...will they bite...will they get tight around your neck...what sex are they...what do they eat...what does cold blooded mean...where do you keep them..?"
I observed that, if you create a safe place and encourage people to engage their curiosity and ask questions, they often get comfortable enough to confront their fear and touch the snake. What doesn't work is telling people their fear is wrong or stupid.
When my irrational fear about spending money surfaces, what helps me is to look at the facts (our financial plan) and ask my financial advisor questions: What happens if the stock market crashes? How much money can I afford to lose? What happens to my plan if I spend a lot of money vacationing? How long will my money last? No question is wrong or stupid. Re-visiting the questions more than once is frequently required. Repetition is the mother of learning.
The goal is to be able to identify the facts so I can let go of the irrational fears. My trusted advisor helps me understand the facts about my money (how it is invested, projected growth, impacts of spending, etc.). I can then get comfortable with a spending plan that doesn't make me fearful and avoid making spending mistakes (click link below for spending mistakes).
So for you, go ahead and touch the boa constrictor.
Retirement Spending Mental Mistakes
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